Watch Out For The Earache Pandemic

Posted: February 15, 2012 by Barbie in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

So, I realize the connection here to prepping is sketchy at best, but I’m feeling a bit rant-y, so you’ll have to bear with me.
For the past three Mondays in a row, one of my coworkers has called in sick. Do you want to take any guesses as to who ends up taking care of his work while he’s out?
Anyway, this past Monday my manager informed me that this guy (we’ll call him Brian) had called in with an earache, so I’d need to figure out what he was working on and make sure everything that needed to be done got done.  At least, I think that’s what he said.  I didn’t hear anything beyond earache, so I’m kind of fuzzy on the rest of the sentence.
Seriously?  He called in for an earache.  Am I the only one who sees something wrong here?
I don’t consider myself to be particularly tough.  In fact, I’m kind of a candyass.  But I have never, ever, missed work because I had a freakin’ earache.  A day of kindergarten?  Possibly.  But work?  Hell no!  In fact, I have a very limited list of things I’d miss work over.  Ready?
Barbie’s List of Reasons To Miss Work
1.  Vomiting more than once.  
2.  Diarrhea of a severity where I’m concerned I might have “an accident.”
3.  Bronchitis or Pneumonia if accompanied by a fever over 100 degrees.
4.  An excellent shoe sale at Nordstrom’s
On second thought, any respectable girl would know about that last one weeks in advance – plenty of time to schedule a vacation day.  I wouldn’t call in sick over it (plus, I can get to from my cube).
My point?  Primarily I needed to vent about my whiny-ass coworker.
But also?  If you have to call in sick over an earache, you’re gonna be screwed when the pandemic hits.  When the CDC boards up your house and keeps you in quarantine, nobody’s gonna be there to bring you Gatorade and Saltines. You’re going to have to man up and take care of yourself. 
So really?  Buck up, little cowboy.  Take some Children’s Tylenol, call your pediatrician, and then man up and COME TO FUCKING WORK!
The economy is counting on you.

  1. David says:

    I hate these people! “Brian” isn’t sick…he’s BS’ing an ailment you can’t really prove. Even if they insisted he go to the doctor…a doctor can’t tell you your ear isn’t hurting. They’ll just give you a note to return. “Brian” is also the person that if he was really sick probably would come to work…best place to get sympathy and to spread it around to you. You know…can’t be wasting sick days on something silly like really being sick.

    Chin up though…in a pandemic or SHTF situation…the Brians of the world will be the first to go!

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